VANDE MATARAM AND OTHER RELIGIONS

Vande mataram , written] by Bankim Chatterji a famous Bengali novelist  was

A very good poem written in praise of our mother land which deserve to be our

National anthem

Out of the blue, the Jamiat-Ulema-e-Hind (Organization of Muslim Scholars Of India) passed a resolution asking members of the Indian Muslim community not to recite ‘Vande Mataram’ on the grounds that some verses of the national song are against the tenets of Islam. What is objectionable to the Ulema is that parts of the National Song, worships Mother India. This is not really worshipping as in a religious sense, but giving it very high honour by treating it on par with one’s mother. An emotional poet’s way of expressing his love for his country. Islam forbids worship of anything other than Allah. Ergo, Vandemataram is anti Islamic. Then how the muslim scholars has allowed  AR rehman to compose and

Sing the song “VANDE MATARAM “  is an unknown truth behind this

SARE JAHAN SE ACHA

Sare Jahan Se Aacha 

The poem Saare Jahan Se Achcha was composed by the poet Sir Allama Muhammad Iqbal in 1904-1905 while India was under British administration. The poem is sung by Indians on occasions of national importance and in schools as part of morning prayer. After the Indian National Song  Jana-Gana-Mana and the Indian National Song  Vande Mataram, Sare Jahan Se Achcha enjoys the reputation as the most popular patriotic song in India. The poem epitomises love for the nation and patriotism.

सारे जहाँ से अच्छा, हिन्दोस्तां हमारा

 हम बुलबुले हैं इसकी, वो गुलसितां हमारा

 पर्वत वो सबसे ऊँचा, हमसाया आसमाँ का

 वो संतरी हमारा, वो पासवां हमारा, सारे...

 गोदी में खेलती हैं, जिसकी हज़ारों नदियां

 गुलशन है जिसके दम से, रश्क-ए-जिनां हमारा

 सारे....

 मजहब नहीं सिखाता, आपस में बैर रखना

 हिन्दी हैं हम वतन हैं, हिन्दोस्तां हमारा, सारे...

 

saare jahaan se achcha hindostaan hamaraa

hum bul bulain hai is kee, ye gulsitan hamaraa

parbat vo sabse unchaa hum saaya aasma kaa

vo santaree hamaraa, vo paasbaan hamaraa

godee mein khel tee hain is kee hazaaron nadiya

gulshan hai jinke dum se, rashke janna hamaraa

mazhab nahee sikhataa apas mein bayr rakhnaa

hindee hai hum, vatan hai hindostaan hamaraa

Translation of the poem in English :

Better than all the world, is our India

 We are its nightingales and this is our garden

That mountain most high; neighbor to the skies

 It is our sentinel; it is our protector

A thousand rivers play in its lap,

 Gardens they sustain, the envy of the heavens is ours

Faith does not teach us to harbor grudges between us

 We are all Indians and India is our homeland

Dear friends 

This song is also finest patriotic song deserved to get the status of our National Anthem 

VANDE MATARAM

This song was written By Bankim chander Chatterji  who was one of the

Famous Bengali novelist . This song was rejected by other religions people

For our national anthem as they feel that the song is written in praise  Bharat

Mata and Goddess durga and lakshmi and in my opinion this song is deserved

To be our national anthem

HJS surrenders unto holy feet of Bharat Mata

Lyrics of Vande Mataram

वन्दे मातरम्

 सुजलां सुफलां मलयजशीतलाम्

 शस्यशामलां मातरम् ।

 शुभ्रज्योत्स्नापुलकितयामिनीं

 फुल्लकुसुमितद्रुमदलशोभिनीं

 सुहासिनीं सुमधुर भाषिणीं

 सुखदां वरदां मातरम् ।। १ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।

 कोटि-कोटि-कण्ठ-कल-कल-निनाद-कराले

 कोटि-कोटि-भुजैर्धृत-खरकरवाले,

 अबला केन मा एत बले ।

 बहुबलधारिणीं नमामि तारिणीं

 रिपुदलवारिणीं मातरम् ।। २ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।

 तुमि विद्या, तुमि धर्म

 तुमि हृदि, तुमि मर्म

 त्वं हि प्राणा: शरीरे

 बाहुते तुमि मा शक्ति,

 हृदये तुमि मा भक्ति,

 तोमारई प्रतिमा गडि

 मन्दिरे-मन्दिरे मातरम् ।। ३ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।

 त्वं हि दुर्गा दशप्रहरणधारिणी

 कमला कमलदलविहारिणी

 वाणी विद्यादायिनी, नमामि त्वाम्

 नमामि कमलां अमलां अतुलां

 सुजलां सुफलां मातरम् ।। ४ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।

 श्यामलां सरलां सुस्मितां भूषितां

 धरणीं भरणीं मातरम् ।। ५ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।। 

Translation by Sri Aurobindo

 Mother, I bow to thee!

 Rich with thy hurrying streams,

 bright with orchard gleams,

 Cool with thy winds of delight,

 Dark fields waving Mother of might,

 Mother free.

Glory of moonlight dreams,

 Over thy branches and lordly streams,

 Clad in thy blossoming trees,

 Mother, giver of ease

 Laughing low and sweet!

 Mother I kiss thy feet,

 Speaker sweet and low!

 Mother, to thee I bow.

Who hath said thou art weak in thy lands

 When the sword flesh out in the seventy million hands

 And seventy million voices roar

 Thy dreadful name from shore to shore?

 With many strengths who art mighty and stored,

 To thee I call Mother and Lord!

 Though who savest, arise and save!

 To her I cry who ever her foeman drove

 Back from plain and Sea

 And shook herself free.

Thou art wisdom, thou art law,

 Thou art heart, our soul, our breath

 Though art love divine, the awe

 In our hearts that conquers death.

 Thine the strength that nervs the arm,

 Thine the beauty, thine the charm.

 Every image made divine

 In our temples is but thine.

Thou art Durga, Lady and Queen,

 With her hands that strike and her

 swords of sheen,

 Thou art Lakshmi lotus-throned,

 And the Muse a hundred-toned,

 Pure and perfect without peer,

 Mother lend thine ear,

 Rich with thy hurrying streams,

 Bright with thy orchard gleems,

 Dark of hue O candid-fair

In thy soul, with jewelled hair

 And thy glorious smile divine,

 Lovilest of all earthly lands,

 Showering wealth from well-stored hands!

 Mother, mother mine!

 Mother sweet, I bow to thee,

 Mother great and free!

JANA GANA MANA

Jana Gana Mana" - Just a thought for the National Anthem! How well do you know about it?

I have always wondered who is the "adhinayak" and "bharat bhagya vidhata",whose praise we are singing. I thought might be Motherland India ! Our current National Anthem "Jana Gana Mana" is sung throughout the country.

Did you know the following about our national anthem, I didn't.

To begin with, India 's national anthem, Jana Gana Mana Adhinayaka, was written byRabindranath Tagore in honour of King George V and the Queen of England when they visited India in 1919. To honour their visit Pandit Motilal Nehru had the five stanzas included,which are in praise of the King and Queen. (And most of us think it is in the praise of our great motherland!! !).In the original Bengali verses only those provinces that were under British rule, i.e. Punjab, Sindh, Gujarat ,Maratha etc.were mentioned. None of the princely states were recognized which are integral parts of India now Kashmir, Rajasthan,Andhra, Mysore or Kerala. Neither the Indian Ocean nor the Arabian Sea was included,since they were directly under Portuguese rule at that time.

The Jana Gana Mana Adhinayaka implies that King George V is the lord of the masses and Bharata Bhagya Vidhata is "the bestower of good fortune". Following is a translation of the five stanzas that glorify the King:

First stanza: (Indian) People wake up remembering your good name and ask for your blessings and they sing your glories. (Tava shubha naame jaage; tava shubha aashish maage, gaaye tava jaya gaatha)

Second stanza: Around your throne people of all religions come and give their love and anxiously wait to hear your kind words.

Third stanza: Praise to the King for being the charioteer, for leading the ancient travelers beyond misery.

Fourth stanza: Drowned in the deep ignorance and suffering, poverty-stricken, unconscious country? Waiting for the wink of your eye and your mother's (the Queen's) true protection.

Fifth stanza: In your compassionate plans, the sleeping Bharat ( India ) will wake up. We bow down to your feet O' Queen,and glory to Rajeshwara (the King).

This whole poem does not indicate any love for the Motherland but depicts a bleak picture. When you sing Jana Gana Mana Adhinayaka, whom are you glorifying? Certainly not the Motherland.Is it God? The poem does not indicate that.It is time now to understand the original purpose and the implication of this,rather than blindly sing as has been done the past fifty years.Nehru chose the present national anthem as opposed to Vande Mataram because he thought that it would be easier for the band to play!!! It was an absurd reason but today for that matter bands have advanced and they can very well play any music. So they can as well play Vande Mataram,which is a far better composition in praise of our Dear Motherland - India Wake up, it's high time! Shouldn't Vande Mataram be our National Anthem ?

Come Join together to put Vande Mataram as our National Anthem.

Dear friends .

This is a controversial subject and the views expressed in this article are  not

My views and it is the view of the author who wrote this article

THOUGHTS OF THOMAS ALVA EDISION

Thomas Edison tried two thousand different materials in search of a filament for the light bulb. When none worked satisfactorily, his assistant complained, “All our work is in vain. We have learned nothing.”

Edison replied very confidently, “Oh, we have come a long way and we have learned a lot. We know that there are two thousand elements which we cannot use to make a good light bulb.”

A REAL RELATION

THE REAL RELATION

I tried to open my eyes but could  not able to do so . I remember that I had a great fall in the bath room and lost my conscious after that what has happened to me I don’t know

Iam able to hear the weeping sound of ladies around me and lot of people were assembled

In my house, and I got confused that if iam dead or alive. My dear wife who was sitting nearby weeping uncontrollably and says “ What a fine husband that god has gifted to me

And I should have performed great punyas  in my prevuious birth to have such  a nice

Husband , you are having stone heart to leave me alone like this “

I remember the incident that has happened a few days ago . There was a quarrel between my wife and me and my son said “ Mother why cant you give  proper respect to my father and why are you treating him always like a dirt   in the final days of his life ?” My wife says”

You don’t know any thing about your father , he deserves to be treated like this because

During his younger days he used to torture me and never treated me like a wife “.

My dear son came towards me and uttered in a choking voice “ What a dear father you were.? How can you leave as alone like this ? we were looking after you like our child and while he   was talking his eyes were roaming to confirm that I was having the 15 carat

Diamond ring on my finger

 

I remember the incident when I ask my son to take me to a hospital to do eye operation as I could not able to see anything. What is the reply I got you know he said “ Why do you need operation which cost more than Re15000/- ? even if you get the vision what you are going to do, are you going to work ? and he advised me to take some eye drops and sleep

In my room ..

Next my youngest daughter came towards me and said “I have lost my wonderful father who has treated his children equally good and provided all the needs , and how iam going

To compensate his lose”

Actually this daughter has quarreled with me that I have shown partiality with her in conducting her  marriage lesse than  her sisters marriage and has not attended the 60^th marriage Celebration

Finally my dear mother who is aged more than 87 came to myside and says in a trembling voice “ God is more cruel and don’t have eyes , He would have taken my life

Instead ofmy dear son “.

One day I was having a big worry and there was no one to console me and I went to my

Mother and asked “ can I keep my head on your lap and sleep for a while “  She said “ Why not my dear son , you are my dear child and even if you attain my age  you are my child only  come on sleep on my  lap “.

When I cannot control my emotion I have started to get up and looked all of them , there was some unbelievable shock on the faces of my wife , son and daughter  and my old mother is crying silently in happiness after seing me alive . That is mother a real relation 

dear friends 
this is  heart touching story of a mother , give me your feed back to improve my quality

EVERY MAN HAS FOUR WIVES

 Our 4 Wives

There was a rich merchant who had The Four Wives

He loved the 4th wife the most.

He adorned her with rich robes and treated her to delicacies.

He took great care of her and gave her nothing but the best.

He also loved the 3rd wife very much.

He's very proud of her and always wanted to show her off to his friends.

However, the merchant is always in great fear that she might run away with some other men.

He too, loved his 2nd wife.

She is a very considerate person, always patient and in fact is the merchant's confidante.

Whenever the merchant faced some problems, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times.

Now, the merchant's 1st wife is a very loyal partner and has made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household.

However, the merchant did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.

One day, the merchant fell ill. Before long, he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself, "Now I have 4 wives with me. But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!"

Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word. The answer cut like a sharp knife right into the merchant's heart.

The sad merchant then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you so much for all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!" replied the 3rd wife. "Life is so good over here! I'm going to remarry when you die!" The merchant's heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife, "I always turned to you for help and you've always helped me out. Now I need your help again. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated.

Then a voice called out : "I'll leave with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go." The merchant looked up and there was his 1st wife. She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition. Greatly grieved, the merchant said, "I should have taken much better care of you while I could have!"

Actually we all have 4 wives in our lives,..

The 4th wife is our body

No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die

Our 3rd wife is our possessions, status and wealth.

When we die, they all go to others

The 2nd wife

Is our family and friends

No matter how close they had been there for us when we're alive, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave

The 1st wife something you can't see is in fact our soul

Often neglected in our pursuit of material wealth and sensual pleasure. It is actually the only thing that follows us wherever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait until we're on our deathbed to lament.

"The 1st wife something you can't see is in fact our soul

Often neglected in our pursuit of material wealth and sensual pleasure. It is actually the only thing that follows us wherever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait until we're on our deathbed to lament. "

The story is not only thought provoking but moral boosting. This is what our culture preaches, for the ideal wife. The great epic ramayana is spun around an ideal relationship of a husband and a wife, where in, some releigion advocates marriage up to four. The Indian custom of saptapadi in marriage, preaches for vowing of this relationship. 

COMEDY YOU WILL LIKE IT

COMEDY YOU WILL  LIKE

The Judge (J.) asks the little girl (LG): Now that your parents are getting divorced do you

want to live with your mummy?

LG - No, my mummy beats me.

J. - Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.

LG - No, my daddy beats me too.

J. - Well then, who do you want to live with?

LG - I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never beat anybody!!!

A big Indian walked into a bar with his pet tiger on a leash and asked the bartender, 'Do

you serve Pakistanis here?' 'Sure we do,' replied the bartender. 'Good,' said the Sardar.

'Give me a beer, and one Pakistani for my tiger

GURU TEG BAHADAR SINGH

GURU TEG BAHADAR SINGH  THE SAVIOR OF HINDU

During 17th Century, when Hindustan was ruled by Mughals, all the Hindu people were

humiliated and were treated like animals. Mughals treated the Hindu women as there

own property and were forcing all Hindus to accept Islam and even used to kill the

people if they were refusing to accept. That time, our ninth Guru, Sri Guru Teg

Bahadarji came forward, in response to a request of some Kashmir Pandits to fight

against all these cruel activities. Guruji told the Mughal emperor that if he could

succeed in converting him to Islam, all the Hindus would accept the same.

But, if he failed, he should stop all those activities

The Mughal emperor happily agreed to that but even after lots of torture to Guruji and

his fellow members he failed to convert him to Islam and Guruji along with his other

four fellow members, were torture! d and sacrificed their lives in Chandni Chowk. Since

the Mughals were unable to convert them to Islam they were assassinated.

Thus Guruji sacrificed his life for the protection of Hindu religion. Can anybody lay

down his life and that too for the protection of another religion? This is the reason he is

still remembered as "Hind Ki Chaddar", shield of India . For the sake of whom he had

sacrificed his life, none of the them came forward to lift his body, fearing that they

would also be assassinated.

Seeing this incident our 10th Guruji, Sri Guru Gobind Singhji (Son of Guru Teg

Bahadarji) founder of khalsa made a resolution that he would convert his followers to

such human beings who would not be able to hide themselves and could be easily located

in thousands.

At the start, the Sikhs were very few in numbers as they were fighting against the

Mughal emperors. At that time, Nadir Shah raided Delhi in the year 1739 and looted

Hindustan and was carrying lot of Hindustan treasures and nearly 2200 Hindu women

along with him. The news spread like a fire

and was heard by Sardar Jassa Singh who was the Commander of the Sikh army at that

time. He decided to attack Nadir Shah's Kafila on the same midnight . He did so and

rescued all the Hindu women and they were safely sent to their homes.

It didn't happen only once but thereafter whenever any Abdaalis or Iranis had attacked

and looted Hindustan and were trying to carry the treasures and Hindu women along

with them for selling them in Abdal markets, the Sikh army although fewer in numbers

but were brave hearted and attacked them at midnight , 12 O'clock and rescued women.

After that time when there occurred a similar incidence, people started to contact the

Sikh army for their help and Sikhs used to attack the raider's at Midnight , 12 O'clock .

Nowadays, these "smart people" and some Sikh enemies who are afraid of Sikhs, have

spread these words that at 12 O'clock , the Sikhs go out of their senses. This historic fact

was the reason which made me smile over that person as I thought that his Mother or

Sister would be in trouble and wants my help and was reminding me by saying off

'Sardarji Barah Baj Gaye' ."

TRICK FOR COMPUTER TO WELCOME YOU

Make your Computer Welcome You


With this trick, you can make your Computer welcome you in its computerized voice instead of having a human said Welcome. You can make your Windows based computer say "Welcome to your PC, Username."

Make Windows Greet you with a Custom Voice Message at Startup

To use this trick, follow the instructions given below:-

1.Click on Start. Navigate to All Programs, Accessories and Notepad.
2.Copy and paste the exact code given below.
Dim speaks, speech
speaks="Welcome to your PC, Username"
Set speech=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice")
speech.Speak speaks
3. Replace Username with your own name. 
4. Click on File Menu, Save As, select All Types in Save as Type option, and save the file as Welcome.vbs or "*.vbs".
5. Copy the saved file. 
6. Navigate to C:\Documents and Settings\All Users\Start Menu\Programs\Startup(in Windows XP) or to C:\Users\ User-Name\AppData\Roaming\Microsoft\Windows\Start Menu\Programs\Startup (in Windows 7 and Windows Vista) if C: is your System drive.
7. Paste the file.


Now when the next time you start your computer, Windows will welcome you in its own computerized voice. 

Note: For best results, it is recommended to change sound scheme to No Sounds.
You can change the sound scheme to No Sounds by following the steps given below:-
1.Go to Control Panel.
2.Then click on Switch to Classic View.
3.Then Click on Sounds and Audio Devices.
4.Then Click on the Sounds Tab.
5.Select No Sounds from the Sound Scheme option.
6.If you wish to save your Previous Sound Scheme, you can save it by clicking Yesin the popup menu.
7.Click on OK.

Try it yourself to see how it works. In my personal opinion, this is an excellent trick. Whenever I start my PC in front of anybody and the PC welcomes me, the fellow is left wondering how brilliant a computer do I have

WHO OWNS THE MEDIA

NDTV: A very popular TV news media is funded by Gospels of Charity in 
Spain. Supports Communism. Recently it has developed a soft corner towards 
Pakistan because Pakistan President has allowed only this channel to be aired in
Pakistan . Indian CEO Prannoy Roy is co-brother of Prakash Karat, General
Secretary of the Communist party of India . His wife and Brinda Karat are
sisters. 
India Today which used to be the only national weekly which supported BJP 
is now bought by NDTV!! Since then the tone has changed drastically and 
turned into Hindu bashing. 

Gujarat riots which took place in 2002 where Hindus were burnt alive, 
Rajdeep Sardesai and Bharkha Dutt working for NDTV at that time got
around 5 Million Dollars from Saudi Arabia to cover only Muslim victims,
which they did very faithfully.. . Not a single Hindu family was interviewed 
or shown on TV whose near and dear ones had been burnt alive, it is
reported. 

CNN-IBN: This is 100 percent funded by Southern Baptist Church with its
branches in all over the world with HQ in US.. The Church annually 
allocates $800 million for promotion of its channel. Its Indian head is Rajdeep
Sardesai and his wife Sagarika Ghosh. 

Times group list: 
Times Of India, Mid-Day, Nav-Bharth Times, Stardust, Femina, Vijay Times,
Vijaya Karnataka, Times now (24- hour news channel) and many more... 
Times Group is owned by Bennet & Coleman. 'World Christian Council does 80
percent of the Funding, and an Englishman and an Italian equally share
balance 20 percent. The Italian Robertio Mindo is a close relative of 
Sonia Gandhi. 
Star TV: It is run by an Australian, who is supported by St. Peters
Pontifical Church Melbourne. 

Hindustan Times: Owned by Birla Group, but hands have changed since 
Shobana Bhartiya took over. Presently it is working in Collaboration with Times
Group. 

The Hindu: English daily, started over 125 years has been recently taken
over by Joshua Society, Berne , Switzerland .. N. Ram's wife is a Swiss
national. 

Indian Express: Divided into two groups. The Indian Express and new Indian
Express (southern edition) ACTS Christian Ministries have major stake in 
the Indian Express and latter is still with the Indian counterpart. 

Eeenadu: Still to date controlled by an Indian named Ramoji Rao. 
Ramoji Rao is connected with film industry and owns a huge studio in 
Andhra Pradesh. 
Andhra Jyothi: The Muslim party of Hyderabad known as MIM along with a
Congress Minister has purchased this Telugu daily very recently. 

The Statesman: It is controlled by Communist Party of India. 

Kairali TV: It is controlled by Communist party of India (Marxist) 

Mathrubhoomi: Leaders of Muslim League and Communist leaders have major
investment. 

Asian Age and Deccan Chronicle: Is owned by a Saudi Arabian Company with 
its chief Editor M.J. Akbar. 
Tarun Tejpal of Tehelka.com regularly gets blank
cheques from Arab countries to target BJP and Hindus only, it is said. 
The ownership explains the control of media in India by foreigners. The
result is obvious. 

GOD WILL NOT ASK

Fifteen things God wont ask u...

God won’t ask which car you drive, but will ask how many people you drove who didn’t have transportation.

God won’t ask how big is your house, but will ask how many people you welcomed into your home. 


God won’t ask about the fancy clothes in your wardrobe, but will ask how many of those clothes helped the needy. 


God won’t ask about your social status, but will ask what kind of class you displayed with others. 


God won’t ask how many material possessions you had, but will ask if they dictated your life. 


God won’t ask what your highest salary was, but will ask if you compromised your character to obtain that salary. 


God won’t ask how much overtime you worked, but will ask if you worked overtime for your family and loved ones. 


God won’t ask how many promotions you received, but will ask how you promoted others. 


God won’t ask what your job title was, but will ask if you reformed your job to the best of your ability. 


God won’t ask what you did to help yourself, but will ask what you did to help others. 


God won’t ask how many friends you had, but will ask how many people to whom you were a true friend. 


God won’t ask what you did to protect your rights, but will ask what you did to protect the rights of others. 


God won’t ask in what neighborhood you lived, but will ask how you treated your neighbors. 

God won’t ask about the color of your skin, but will ask about the content of your character. 


God won’t ask how many times your deeds matched your words, but will ask how many times they didn’t. 


god wont ask if u have went thru this mail, but will ask if you have followed them from now on.

A Horse and the beauty

A cosmic god had a horse. The horse was beautiful and also it had many good qualities. But it wanted to be more perfect in every way. It especially wanted to become beauty unparalleled.

One day the horse said to the cosmic god, “0 Lord, you have given me beauty. You have given me other good qualities. I am so grateful to you. But how I wish you could make me more beautiful. I would be extremely, extremely grateful if you could make me more beautiful.”

The cosmic god said, “I am more than ready to make you more beautiful. Tell me in what way you want to be changed.”

The horse said, “It seems to me that I am not well proportioned. My neck is too short. If you can make my neck a little longer, my upper body will be infinitely more beautiful. And if you can make my legs much longer and thinner, then I will look infinitely more beautiful in my lower body.”

The cosmic god said, “Amen!” Then immediately he made a camel appear in place of the horse. The horse was so disheartened that it started to cry, “0 Lord, I wanted to become more beautiful. In what way is this kind of outer form more beautiful?”

The cosmic god said, “This is exactly what you asked for. You have become a camel.”

The horse cried, “Oh no, I do not want to become a camell I wish to remain a horse. As a horse, everybody appreciated my good qualities. Nobody will appreciate me as a camel.”

The cosmic god said, “Never try to achieve or receive more than I have given you. If you want to lead a desire-life, then at every moment you will want more and more. But you have no idea what the outcome will be. If you cry for a longer neck and legs, this is what will happen. Each thing in my creation has its own good qualities. The camel is not as beautiful as you are, but it carries heavy loads and has a tremendous sense of responsibility.

IT IS ONLY PERFORMANCE AND NOT POSITION

A Priest dies & is awaiting his turn in line at the Heaven's Gates.

Ahead of him is a guy, fashionably dressed, in dark sun glasses, a long

shirt, leather jacket & jeans.

God asks him: Please tell me who are you, so that I may know whether to

admit you into the kingdom of Heaven or not?

The guy replies: I am Pandi, Auto driver from Chennai!

God consults his ledger, smiles & says to Pandi: Please take this silken

robe & gold scarf & enter the Kingdom of Heaven ...

Now it is the priest's turn. He stands erect and speaks out in a booming

voice: I am Pope's Assistant so & so, Head Priest of the so & so Church

for the last 40 years.

God consults his ledger & says to the Priest: Please take this cotton

robe & enter the Kingdom of Heaven ...

'Just a minute,' says the agonized Priest. 'How is it that a foul

mouthed, rash driving Auto Driver is given a Silken robe & a Golden

scarf and me, a Priest, who's spent his whole life preaching your Name &

goodness has to make do with a Cotton robe?'

Results my friend, results,' shrugs God.

'While you preached, people SLEPT; but when he drove his Auto, people

PRAYED'

WHO IS POOR

One day, a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family. On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, “How was the trip?”

“It was great, Dad.”

“Did you see how poor people live?” the father asked.

“Oh yeah,” said the son.

“So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?” asked the father.

The son answered, “I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden, and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden, and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard, and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on, and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to protect us; they have friends to protect them.”

The boy’s father was speechless.

Then his son added, “Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are.”

PAIN AND THE SALT

Bitterness of Life

 An experienced wise master grew tired of his Disciple complaining. One morning he sent the Disciple for some salt.

When the Disciple returned, the master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and drink it.

"How does it taste?" the master asked.

"Bitter," spit the Disciple.

The master chuckled and then asked the young man to put a handful of Salt in the lake nearby.

The two walked to the nearby lake. After the apprentice swirled his handful of salt into the water, the old man said, "Now drink from the lake...”

As the water dripped down the young man's chin, the master asked, "Now How does this taste?"

"Fresh Sweet" remarked the Disciple.

"Do you taste the salt?" asked the master.

"No," said the young man.

At this, the master sat beside the young man who so reminded him of himself at one time and held his hands.

He told the young man, "The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains exactly the same. However, the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in

HOSPITAL WINDOW

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room’s only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man couldn’t hear the band – he could see it. In his mind’s eye as the gentleman by th! e window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.

He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.

It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, “Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.”

FACE THE DIFFICULTY POSITIVELY

Face difficulties positively  

This parable is told of a farmer who owned an old mule. The mule fell into the farmer’s well. The farmer heard the mule praying or whatever mules do when they fall into wells. After carefully assessing the situation, the farmer sympathized with the mule, but decided that neither the mule nor the well was worth the trouble of saving. Instead, he called his neighbors together, told them what had happened, and enlisted them to help haul dirt to bury the old mule in the well and put him out of his misery.

Initially the old mule was hysterical! But as the farmer and his neighbors continued shoveling and the dirt hit his back, a thought struck him. It suddenly dawned on him that every time a shovel load of dirt landed on his back, HE WOULD SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP!

This he did, blow after blow. “Shake it off and step up…shake it off and step up…shake it off and step up!” He repeated to encourage himself. No matter how painful the blows, or how distressing the situation seemed, the old mule fought panic and just kept right on SHAKING IT OFF AND STEPPING UP!

It wasn’t long before the old mule, battered and exhausted, stepped triumphantly over the wall of that well! What seemed like it would bury him actually helped him . . . all because of the manner in which he handled his adversity.

THAT’S LIFE! If we face our problems and respond to them positively, and refuse to give in to panic, bitterness, or self-pity.

LAUGH ALOUD IF YOU CAN

Sardar: My mobile bill how much?

Call centre girl: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status

Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.

Sardar built 2 Swimming Pools. And he left one of them unfilled?

When asked him, he said,

"Oye, that's for those who don't know Swimming.

Sardar: I think that girl is deaf.

Friend: How do u know?

Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new

Sardar: Miss, Did u call me on my mobile?

Teacher: Me? No, why?

Sardar: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- "1 Miss Call".

Judge: Don't U have shame? It is d 3rd time U R coming to court.

Sardar to judge: U R coming daily, don't U have shame?

Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?

Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE.

Sardar in airplane going to Bombay. While its landing he was excited and shouted: " Bombay ... Bombay "

Air hostess said: "B silent."

Sardar: "Ok. Ombay. Ombay"

Sardar got a sms from his girl friend: "I MISS YOU"

Sardarji replied: "I Mr YOU" !!.

Son: papa, 4+3 kithne hai?

Sardar: ullu ke patthe, gadhe, idiot, naalaayak, besharam, tujhe kuch nahi aathaa? Jaa andhar se CALCULATOR le ke Aa..

After finishing MBBS Sardar started his practice.

He Checked 1st Patient's Eyes, Tongue & Ears with a Torch & Finally Said: "Oye, Torch is okay"

A Sardar, a German and a Pakistani got arrested consuming alcohol which is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia, so

for the terrible crime they are all sentenced 20 lashes each of the whip.

As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik announced:

'It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping.'

The German was first in line; he thought for a while and then said:

'Please tie a pillow to my back.'

This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes & the German had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain.

The Pakistani was next up. After watching the German in horror he said

smugly: 'Please fix two pillows to my back.'

But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes & the Pakistani was also led away whimpering loudly.

The Sardar was the last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said:

'You are from a most beautiful part of the world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!'

'Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful highness,' Sardar replied.

'In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes..'

'Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave.' The Sheik said with an admiring look on his face.

'If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it.' And what is your second wish?' the Sheik asked.

Sardar smiled and said, 'Tie the Pakistani to my back' !!!

'SINGH IS KING'

.

 Man: Is

 there any way for long life?

 Dr: Get married.

 Man: Will it help?

 Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

 ------------ --------- --------- ----

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?

 It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands

 before the fight begins!

 --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?

 Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs

Arranged.

 It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being

 murdered.

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful

 things as women

 and then he turns them into Wives.

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 If u r married please ignore this msg,

 for everyone else: Happy Independence Day

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking

 about something you

 say.

 After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster

 than electronic

 banking.

 It's called marriage.

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Girlfriends r like chocolates,

taste good anytime.

 Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.

 Husbands r like leftovers, eaten when there's no

 choice.

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or

 cremated?

 Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the

 ash.

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Q: Why dogs don't marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

here was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so

 much that he

would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is

 going thru hell.

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying

 & the other

 ensures you

 continue to do so for the rest of your life!

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second

 woman?

 A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the

 same offence!

 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

 Here comes the Ultimate One :)

 Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man,

 The Master of Women'?

 Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side,

 sir.

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